Conducting The Music Of Your Family's Life

​There are so many laws, rules, and formulas out there that can​ pile up burdens of guilt on any mom.​ There were always rules to make me​ question myself:

“The best time to meet with God is in the early hours of​ the morning—if you don’t study the Bible then, you will miss out​ on His voice of greeting.”

“A real mom keeps all of the insides of her drawers organized.”

“A real mom sews; after all, the Proverbs 31 woman did.”

“A real mom corrects every single disobedient action of her​ children.”

“A real mom doesn’t work or spend time away from her​ children.”

God wants you to be alive and share in that life with​ your children. He wants to help you develop a foundation of joy,​ imagination, and beauty in the lives you share together.

What kind of home​ do you want to live in? How can you craft a home and a schedule​ that is interesting for you and your children? 

In taking responsibility​ for being a conductor of the music of your and your family’s life,​ you will find joy and fulfillment, and, as I did with my sweet kids,​ eventually find that you have developed your own best friends out​ of your own children, who have learned to love what you love.

Tea Time Tuesday: Faithfulness: The Hard Work of the Soul

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Join me today with a cup of tea and be inspired. Today my podcast is about:

Faithfulness: Fruit of the Spirit; Full of faith, and loyal, constant, steadfast

“Trust in the Lord and do good, Dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness.” -Psalm 37: 3

Sitting in the shade of our front porch, gently rocking as we shared a sweet moment, out of the blue, one of my adult children commented, “Thanks for being faithful through all these years. It has been a gift to us in more ways than you will ever know. Not only your example, but you spared us from scars that so many of our peers have born in their lives. I know it took many choices to keep going, to be faithful to your ideals. Just wanted you to know it mattered.”

I was surprised but deeply grateful. Faithfulness matters. It is the hard work of the soul. It is rare in our time. As I look back over my life, I realize that much of my blessing right now was due to the fact that somewhere along the way, I learned the value of keeping going, putting one foot in front of the other, remaining faithful through all of the dark passages.

Faithful in marriage, even when it was hard.

Faithful to my ideals as a mama, even when I didn’t feel like I was making progress.

Faithful to my God even when it felt like He was hiding.

Faithful to my children when they failed or showed their frailty and humanity.

Faithful to keep going forward, one step at a time, even when I felt I was failing.

The world gives us permission to quit, to give up, to drop our ideals. God encourages us to be faithful, to commit to being steadfast, to stay loyal.

Many eras I didn't think I would live through — crying babies with colic; ear infections, nocturnal asthma; fits, fusses, tantrums, a mysterious child with ADHD, OCD and ODD; marriage struggles between me, a totally romantic, relational woman married to a totally rational, organized man who had to work way too many hours to keep this family afloat; messes, rejections from family for our ideals; 24 moves; loneliness, little help or support systems; financial crisis; illnesses, hospitalizations, testings never ending; church splits; irrational people.

More on my podcast.

Receive His Love By Faith

To find the strength to do such a supernatural thing, however, requires some very​ practical soul care. A soul that is empty from the constant draining of life will not find​ resources to stand against the darkness that tries to overwhelm​.

One thing that helps​ me greatly is reading. My favorite authors become my friends. Just reading their stories​ has fed my soul and shown me how to live my life.

Of course, I also keep chocolate hidden​ as a treat for a difficult day, and I always have tea in a real china cup every afternoon​ with candles lit and just a bit of​ civility​ — even if only for fifteen minutes.

Most of all, I remind myself over and over again that God, my precious Father,​ loves me and wants me to experience His joy. I have resolved to look for His love and​ receive it by faith, even when I don’t feel it.

​Read more about this in Mom Heart Moments.

Love Is Most Important

The connection of a mother and child is deeply physical, emotional, and even spiritual. By God's design, children will always sense at some level a special connection to their mother that gives her a unique voice and influence in their lives and hearts. If properly cultivated, developed, and understood within the context of God-given personality drives, it is a powerful source of influence.

When children feel loved and cherished by the parents who brought them into the world, they have enduring stability and security that provides them with groundwork for understanding the God of the universe who so loves us. Love is the most important foundation for learning to believe in God.

Read more about this in Your Mom Walk with God.

Tea Time Tuesday: Goodness: Holy Spirit

Once in a while, I spontaneously take a photo of myself, whatever I am doing, to send to my grandchildren who live over 4600 miles away from me. You see, they are always on my mind, in my thoughts.

I want them to know that I love them, every day, all the time. I send little notes of encouragement, affirm their preciousness to me, tell them stories and I pray for them. I plan for times of fun when we can be together. I pray that their hearts would so personally know and understand the goodness and love of God because they have seen it in me and in their parents and in those around them. They don’t just need to be told to be good, but they have to see goodness, holiness, trustworthy character acted out in their real worlds, every day, all the time so that they understand the actions and works of goodness in a fallen world. .

They are storing up a clear picture of God through those of us who are acting out His tangible love and grace in day to day realities in their lives. And hopefully when they are teens and young adults and more aware of a fallen, chaotic world, they will remember, “But I have seen, learned, and felt the goodness and love of God throughout my life through Queenie and mama and daddy. I believe in the goodness of God because I have seen it in reality. I believe there is light, hope, beauty to be found in this troublesome world.”

Join me today as I explore what’s the biblical attribute of goodness. It should be a fruit of the Holy Spirit living through us so that in a fallen world, we may live out God’s excellent goodness so that others may have a picture of what God’s excellent character is like.

I Wish You Peace Today

Mamas are my wonderful heroes, you who would take on this enormous task of subduing and civilizing your home, your family, and your lives. No easy task.

There is no rational reason why someone would give up her life, her body, her time, her rights, for the well-being and building up of someone else. Servant mothers throughout history have portrayed Christ by living sacrificially and giving up their lives for others.

Is there an area in which you’ve lately been tempted to give up? How might considering yourself as a model of Christ’s love and righteousness, grace and peace, strengthen your resolve to stay in the battle and overcome?

Read more about this in Mom Heart Moments.

Every Child Has A Unique Design

For the home-educating parent, the personality, strength, and limitations of children will be constant factors in the learning process, touching on every aspect of family dynamics and child-rearing.

How a child lives and learns— and how a parent teaches and trains—will be unavoidably shaped and affected by these issues.

Even as we have children with learning disabilities, physical limitations, or spectrum issues, we need to look deep inside at their potential and personalities to see how we might strengthen them to have a vibrant life.

Read more about this in Awaking Wonder.

Tea Time Tuesday: Be Kind, One to Another

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There have been many times in my life when I was worn to the bone and didn’t even realize how much. But when someone treated me with unexpected kindness, my heart was touched deeply and hope began to bubble up in my heart, again. Breathing rest and peace for a few small minutes filled me with an ability to keep going again. One such time, on a cold and wintry night, our doorbell rang. I wasn’t expecting anyone. There stood a very pregnant woman holding a heavy box, with flowers poking out from inside.

“May I bring this to the kitchen,” she practically whispered.

In the kitchen, she began to unload the box: A fresh loaf of homemade bread, a homemade chicken pot pie, a mixed salad with pecans, feta and tomatoes, a bunch of mixed flowers and a lovely card at the bottom.

She said, “You give to people all the time. You have sick children, hosted our women’s group and so much more. The Lord put it on my heart that you might be in need of some personal kindness and encouragement, so I made all of this today for you.” I was happily stunned.

Who needs your thoughtfulness, kindness this week? How can you display it to your children? Your friend? Your husband? Choose at least 2 people you might show the kindness of God who are in need of His benevolence.

God bless you, my friends to sense the kindness of God in your life.

God Has A Long-Term Perspective

God doesn't grow us in character and joy quickly. He has a long-term perspective for me. He sees the training process over a period of years and is always seeking to move me ahead in my character.

It is in being faithful to our own set of tests that we become mature and fitted for the ministry he has called each of us to accomplish. If we aspire to be a general, so to speak, spiritually, then we must first pass the training and tests of life as a private.

Read more about this in Dancing With My Heavenly Father.

What Does It Mean To Mentor Your Children?

Can you imagine how different Christianity would be if the disciples had just been given a book to read and to be tested on at the end of the reading instead of having a personal, in-the-flesh, loving friend-mentor?

This begs the questions for us: Are we the people we want our students to become? If your student becomes like you, what will he or she be like? What would we need to change to be the model of what we hope to nurture them to become?

Parents who choose to mentor their children actively initiate them and seek their overall well-being and long-term development. It is a lifelong relationship that is active, intentional, life-giving, responsive.

Mentors do not just disseminate facts, they embody a force of life, love, and inspiration. They become personal in their relationship to their "students."

Read more about this in Awaking Wonder.